I'm a big fan of sideways smileys right now :o) I have cought this strange bug where I text them, email them, blog them, put them on birthday cards.... It's become a bit of a compulsion lately. Weird thind is I've been anything but smiley! I'd hit a wave of feeling particularly down with things this week and not been shaken out of it. I'm hoping that it's not a long term thing but I think it was a long time coming where I realised that I perhaps am a little depressed and frustrated with life. I am naturally a worrier and so many little niggly things can mount up into a huge boulder you're dragging around.
Don't get me wrong, I loved going to ravelry day last week- it was a great break to spend some much needed time out but I felt guilty about it too. I feel guilty about not doing the ironing, leaving bills to the last minute, having a demanding job and feeling rubbish and generally being short tempered at home. I think that sometimes it has to get to this point when you realise you cannot cope and that some of these things just cannot change or aren't as important as we think. I have to try and get myself from this slump to a happy human being again and paying attention to more important things.
I find it difficult to admit that juggling being a mom and working full time and trying to get my portfolio is dampening my spirits and making me feel inadequate because I'm not coping as well as some people would. I thinkt he best step forward will be to not expect that I should cope and get on with taking it a day at a time.
And so to cheer me up until I can get my mitts on my parcel and post again, I'm going to put up the scenic pics from last saturday to remind of the lovely day we had.
Well I'm off to bed, so goodnight x
3 comments:
You know what? It could have been me writing this post...perhaps this is how all BMS's feel?
My advice is give yourself a break! Look at what you're doing....
1. Raising a little one (the MOST important job in the world)
2. Working FULL TIME in the NHS (a very important job)
3. Studying
4. Keeping house
And you're worrying about not getting the ironing done?? Silly girl!! :o)
You cannot do everything! You need to make sure you take time for yourself so that you are able to do any or all the above with enthusiam and energy. So if having a day off every now and then helps, do it without guilt!
Anyway, I should take some of my own advice! Hugs, hugs and more hugs to help you feel better! xxx
Ditto Janey's comment. Take a step back and look at all the wonderful things you do do... You definitely deserved a day off, so don't kick yourself for it. Let me know if you fancy a chat or someone to moan at and I'll come and help with the ironing :o) (P.s. If it makes you feel better my ironing is sitting in the same place it was last weekend too and I don't have any of the above excuses!)
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